you are my sunshine

bedussey:

OMfg i was in starbucks and i saw this girl with pink hair and a shirt with an inverted cross on it and i hissed “hipster blogger” and she hissed back because she was actually a snake haha what’s a SNAKe doing in star bucks? i only have 60 followes

operameister:

thisismythanksgivingurl-gobble:

agentgreenfishy:

poselikeateam:

fuck-i-just:

Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”

Why does this not have any notes?

lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”

“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”

“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”

fredschilton:

if you ever feel like a failure, just remember that jack crawford and the fbi arrested a vegan as the main suspect on a cannibal case